My Adventures in Court

So my car got stolen last August. It was a fun time. The police caught the bad guy and then everything was fine. ...Until I had to give up two half days (equal to one full day) sitting in both the preliminary hearing and then the first court appearance. My witness testimony only took about 5-10 minutes each time, and yet both times I sat for 4 hours, hoping against hope that my case was next. I would also like to point out that it has been almost 8 months since my car was stolen, and yet this case has been prolonged, and continues to be prolonged, for almost a year.

This morning was installment #2 of my court adventures. This was the first court appearance (which happens after a preliminary hearing, which I attended in November). This means that I had to go down to the official courthouse in center city Philly and see how the city justice system goes down.

I was not impressed.

First of all, the courthouse is built so that everyone involved in the trials take the same set of elevators. This means that lawyers (private lawyers, district attorneys, public defenders), defendants on bail, witnesses, complainants, and victims all go through the same entrance, hallway, and elevators. How stupid is that?!

Then I get to the courtroom my case was taking place in, to find out that more than 20 cases are all being brought in front of the judge this morning. It started to dawn on me that I was never going to get out of there.

From 9:30-10:40, the DA, public defenders, and judge all decided which cases were ready to be tried. Then the judge announced a break until 11 so that the lawyers could speak with their witnesses. The DA asked me a few questions and prepped me about how testifying would work. At 11:25 we finally started court again. At this point my butt has gone completely numb from sitting for hours on the oh-so-comfortable benches they have us sit on.

One case is called before mine, about a bar fight that was supposedly started by the defendant. The public defender was not the brightest bulb on the Christmas tree. Here is a brilliant example as he questions the victim:

"How long would you say the fight lasted?"
"I honestly don't know. It felt like forever."
"Can you give us a ballpark? Around 5 minutes, or 20 minutes?"
"I just told you. I don't know. I didn't look at my watch while I was being punched."
"So you said after a while two women walked by, and then the fight continued after they left."
"Yes."
"So how long did the full fight last? More or less than 30 minutes?"
"I told you. I. DON'T. KNOW."

Meanwhile, the public defender calls the defendant's cousin to the stand, WHO DIDN'T EVEN WITNESS THE FIGHT-- she was in the bar the whole time, while the fight occurred outside. Her testimony was completely irrelevant. The icing on the cake, however was this exchange between the cousin and the DA:
"Do you remember the night of December 9th, 2006?"
"Yes."
"You were at a bar that night with the defendant, correct?"
"Yes."
"How old are you?"
"21."
"And when is your birthday?"
"January 26th."
*pause*
"So...you were 20 years old on December 9th, 2006. In a bar. At midnight."
*Without batting an eye* "Yes."

Yeeeeaaaaah. So anyway, my case is finally called around 12:30, and I'm the first witness to take the stand. I got to swear in and everything. I was asked questions by the DA, the oh-so-bright public defender, and the judge. I was then ushered into a side room in which I could not hear the police officer, the mother of the defendant, and the defendant's testimonies. They ushered me back in so that I could hear the two lawyers' final statements and the verdict. The judge rendered him guilty of unauthorized use of a motor vehicle, and not guilty of receipt of stolen property. Seems they couldn't prove that he knew the car was stolen, since he claimed his cousin gave him the car. Yeaaaaaahhhhh riiiiiight. His sentencing hearing is in May.

I would like to point out that he was originally charged with 3 felonies, including grand theft auto. He was only found guilty of one "minor" felony after all that.

At yet, I still had to sit in court, doing absolutely nothing, for 8 hours.

Ladies and gentlemen, your tax dollars at work.

I stole this from Wayne, but it was really cool!

My visual DNA:

Read my VisualDNA™ Get your own VisualDNA™

Never press a button if you don't know what it does.

...This is my new philosophy on life. I'm visiting my parents this week, and I thought it might be fun to show them my sorority Lip Synch performance from Greek Week 2004. Unfortunately, it's a new VCR/DVR combo and we couldn't find the eject button.

So, in her infinite wisdom, Mom starts pressing random buttons-- resulting in her recording over half the performance. I emailed the guy who made me the copy, and he no longer has the original since he taped over it with this past Christmas. None of my sorority sisters seem to have copies either. So I am doomed to only have half of it because of a stupid button.

There, now we've all learned a valuable life lesson.

Also, never tape over your wedding video with a Super Bowl Game. That never ends well... or so I've heard.