Back to Being a(n Upstate) New Yorker!

Well, well, well. It's been WAY too long since I've written! Time to do a major update!

After all that has happened, I am now back in my hometown area, interning at a local church that happens to literally be across the street from my old high school. Weird, I know. Who would've thought that I would find the internship site that was the best fit for me just down the road from where I grew up?? God definitely has a sense of humor.

I started internship here in June, and so far it's been challenging, fun, and chock-full of learning moments. The people here are really welcoming, and I thank God everyday for sending me here to get hands-on experience for pastoral ministry. Being near my family again has alternately been great and a little grating, but that's to be expected when you're 26 years old and move back to the area after being away for 8 years.

My biggest challenge outside of internship has been to get a life outside of church. I've been hanging out with old friends, and trying really hard to meet new people so that having a social life will actually happen. So far, I'm doing pretty well, I think.

It's been cool being back in NY. I miss Philly, but being in an area that I know pretty well has been a blessing. :)

Back in Philly

So after an unplanned turn of events, I have returned to Philly to take classes. Sometimes things just don't work out the way we expect them to-- and that's OK.

I got to be with my family and help them out for 2 weeks, and then I came back down here to start classes and hang out with people I've missed very much. I'm taking some really great classes this semester, so I'm pretty excited (Call me a nerd if you want-- I don't mind!!)!

As for the future, well... God has it under control and I'm along for the ride. :)

"Hey, are you the New York lady?!"

Well, I've been in Nebraska for a month now, and so far everyone thinks that my New York license plates are just plain hilarious. The quote above was from a guy who lives in my apartment cluster (not really a complex), driving by in his pick-up truck. When asked where he was going and if he had any fun plans for the day, he replied "No idea. Just somewhere." I've noticed that people here tend to drive long distances to get places (because they have to!), and many just drive for fun.

Things I've learned so far about being a Vicar in small-town Nebraska:

-ALWAYS be wearing something that you don't mind being seen in. This includes in your own apartment/house; people will randomly stop by "on their way" somewhere. Kids will ring your doorbell and ask for you to come out and play. Church members will knock and then hand you bags filled with fresh vegetables from their gardens.

-People don't lock their cars or the doors to their residences. When I lock my car in front of someone, they will almost always make a crack that NO ONE would want to steal my old Chevy Malibu.

-I found out the town's attitude towards me right away; when I came out to my car one day the first week I was here, someone had written on my windshield "Welcome to Emerson!" On the driver's side window, the person had also written "Please wash me!" Welcoming, yet poking fun.

-People really do wear cowboy hats and boots on a regular basis. People are still commenting on the cowgirl boots that I wore to our annual Western Days.

-No one wears high heels. When I'm "on duty" I wear heels. I've gotten many comments on them. One woman said "We have to get you some comfortable shoes!" I explained that I do indeed have comfortable shoes. She gave me this look, like "why are you wearing those heels, then, if you own other shoes?"

-Outside of the Northeast, people seem to forget that there is a whole big state above the city of New York. When I say I'm from New York originally, they automatically assume that means the city. When I explain that I'm actually from upstate NY, I usually get blank looks. So then I just tell people I lived in Philadelphia for the last four years, and that usually gets the conversation going again.

-Single people barely exist here. I'm pretty sure I am the only young, single female in town. There are a few single guys that run farms outside of town, but that's about it. Everyone else is married/living with someone, and almost everyone has kids.

-EVERYONE listens to country-western music here. At the town Talent Show I judged, every singer sang a country song-- except the girl who sang a cute song about Jesus. When I drive youth members to events, most of them are disappointed that we do not listen to country music in my car. I've only found two radio stations so far that play other music besides country or contemporary Christian stuff.

-People think it's hilarious that I know nothing about farming. I'm not shy about asking questions, to which they always smile and answer enthusiastically. When done explaining, they usually end with a comment like "You big city people have a lot to learn!"

-The Nebraska Cornhuskers are the biggest thing going. People are just plain obsessed. Everyone and their mother, literally, wears Nebraska shirts, hats, etc. A very close second to the Huskers are the local high school sports teams. Most of the town turns up for football, basketball, volleyball, and softball games at the high school. Homecoming is a huge deal; female youth group members have already asked me my opinion on how much they should be willing to spend on a dress for the big event.

-Almost everyone owns at least one pet, usually a dog. Not being an animal person, I've learned to ask before doing home visits if the person owns a pet, so that I am forewarned that I may be jumped on by dog(s) upon arrival.

-No one knows the addresses to where people live. People will say things like "just turn left at the house that John Doe built," which is not very helpful if you're new to town and are used to finding your way around by street names and where streets meet-- and besides, you have no idea who John Doe is/was, let alone what house he built.

-Much conversation here revolves around rainfall and how the corn/soybeans are looking this year. Also included in most conversations are cattle raising techniques and who is married to who.

"City girls are just country girls-- with cuter outfits!" ~SATC

Now that my second year of seminary is done, it's time to start looking ahead to my internship year, which is starting this summer. I've lived in Philly for 4 years now, and I'm a little nervous about moving to rural Nebraska after being a "city girl" for so long.

Maybe they'll let me drive a tractor again. That could be cool.

I'm hoping that the culture shock won't be too bad-- although it's hard to believe that it won't be substantial considering I'm going from a Northeast city to the rural Midwest. But I am looking forward to experiencing things that I never have before, like the joys of a Midwestern Lutheran potluck, mud races, Native American pow-wows, cows (up close and personal!), and the harvest time.

I'm both nervous and excited at the same time.

...Well, at least I'll get to experience first-hand some of the farming/harvest metaphors Jesus used in his parables!! :)

Celebrating Single-ness...?

Wow! It's been a really long time since I've updated my blog. I promise I'll be better about it in the future.

This entry is inspired by a huge realization-- I can't think of any songs that actually celebrate being single.

One of my favorite Sex and the City episodes is when Carrie has to take her shoes off at a baby shower-- and someone steals her shoes. The mom that hosted the shower refuses to pay for Carrie's more than $400 Manolos, even though it was her fault that they were stolen in the first place. This prompts Carrie to realize that there are no times when people who are single are celebrated after graduation. Birthdays don't count, since everyone has birthdays. Carrie realizes that she has spent about $2,000 on the woman in question: an engagement gift, wedding gift, and baby shower gifts for her 3 kids. And yet, as a single woman, Carrie gets bupkis. (At the end of the show, the woman finally relents when Carrie "registers" at Manolo Blahnik for her "marriage to herself!")

Now, as depressing as that sounds, it's totally true. And the songs we listen to totally reflect this. There are tons of songs voicing a desire to have that special someone, but none that I can think of really celebrating being single.

Just two songs from Broadway musicals to get us thinking:
1) "Someone to Watch Over Me" from Crazy for You. Besides the fact that my inner feminist cringes at most of the song, the last stanza is:

Won't you tell him please to put on some speed,
Follow my lead,
Oh, how I need,
Someone to watch over me.

2) "Being Alive" from Company, when Bobby realizes he wants to get married:

Somebody need me too much,
Somebody know me too well,
Somebody pull me up short
And put me through hell
And give me support
For being alive,
Make me alive.

Make me confused,
Mock me with praise,
Let me be used,
Vary my days.
But alone is alone, not alive!

Songwriters seem to be so good at voicing this need to not be alone, but what about voicing being happy while unattached?? Maybe I've been reading too many Joshua Harris books-- but it's true that society pushes us to want to be in relationships. Something is wrong with us if we are single-- and that makes me want to throw things. I'm perfectly happy being single right now, with my transient state of moving around and grad school. And yet, this is not OK in society. People worry that I'll end up an old maid or something.

Even in the non-Broadway world I haven't managed to find any songs that celebrate singleness without going man-hater or scary. "So What" by Pink is a good example of this-- it's singleness with a bitter and scary edge. Even "All the Single Ladies" by Beyonce, which at first seemed to have some potential, goes into a scolding of an ex for caring that she is dancing with someone else. "If you liked it then you should have put a ring on it" she sings over and over.

Are there no songs celebrating a person's right and happiness of not pursuing a relationship??

"Are You Saved?"

No matter where I turn, this question seems to come up lately.

The idea for this blog entry started with my friend Becca M-C, who graduated from the seminary last year and is waiting for a First Call to a church. When she came back to visit, she wore the shirt in the picture above all around Philly, which spurred some interesting conversations. When we went to the spice store in Chestnut Hill, the shirt started a conversation about Church hymns and social justice.

Then we went to the Italian Market in South Philly, and stopped in for some chocolate-covered, peanut-butter-filled pretzels (oh man, were they good!). The woman behind the counter got really excited when she saw her shirt. A dialogue like this ensued:

Woman: I love your shirt!
B M-C: Oh, thanks!
Woman: Are you saved?
B M-C: Umm...uh....well.... I just graduated from seminary and I'm waiting for a call.
Woman: Well, Jesus is the only way to Heaven, and most people don't believe that. But He is.
B M-C (and me): Oh, well, um, thanks... 'bye!

Becca and I talked about this conversation afterwards, and she said something like: "I don't really know what to say when I'm asked that question... as a Lutheran, I don't really believe that I gained salvation at a specific moment... and I'm not really comfortable with the 'saved' language."

This made me think. Usually, I have the same reaction when someone asks me if I'm "saved." If the question was, do you believe in Jesus Christ, I would answer yes. If the question was, do you think you have eternal life because of Jesus, I would answer yes. But the minute the word "saved" comes in, for some reason (like many other mainline protestants) my tongue gets tied up.

I believe that one of the main reasons many mainline protestants are adverse to the "saved" language is because the language is so tied-in with conservative fundamental Christians. Even as a Christian, I am sometimes put-off by the aggressive evangelism tactics in which the goal is to "save the lost." I'm all for sharing my faith in Jesus with others, but there is a time and a place. And a (perhaps less heavy-handed) technique.

I don't think I have an adversity to saying that I'm saved (because I am), I just have an adverse reaction to it because of its negative connotation from those who use it too aggressively.


These thoughts in my head about "saved" language continued when I attended the Friday night of Greg Laurie's 3-night Harvest Crusade in Philly at the beginning of October (see picture above). Christians attending are encouraged to "bring an unsaved friend." Numbers are tallied of how many people come up at the altar call at the end of the event, to see how many people came to Christ.

I'm thinking that, although I am dubious about these "crusades" (and the use of that word is a bit disconcerting in of itself) as an evangelism tactic, I think that revivals in general are great. Revivals aren't something that is usually used in mainline Protestantism, but revivals have the ability to bring in new people to the church and to fire-up church-goers who have gotten a bit too comfortable in their faith. The revival idea that "Evangelical Christians" use is something that can be really great and a "mountain top" experience.

So here's the thing: "Evangelical Christians" are on to something-- and mainline Protestants could really benefit from taking some pages out of their book(s). They are unabashed about their faith in Jesus and how it has changed their life. They do not shy away from the connection of emotion with that of the Gospel message. They are passionate about sharing Jesus with others in a way that mainline Protestants are usually lacking. Their revival services are a great way to wake people up. They use music in worship that stirs in me a way that traditional hymns do not (although, conversely, traditional hymns also affect me in a way that contemporary worship music does not).

This discussion was further deepened for me this past Sunday. I was blown away yesterday by a guest-preacher's sermon at a non-denominational, Evangelical church near my parents' house. This church is one that I've sort-of adopted when I come visit my parents (since my home church is in Philly), and I enjoy the change of pace by worshiping in a "contemporary Evangelical" setting, even if the theology may be something that I don't agree with all of the time. But this past Sunday, a guest preacher preached on the passage in Mark having to do with the young rich ruler asking Jesus: "What must I do to inherit eternal life?" And, lo and behold, the preacher preached one of the best sermons on grace alone that I have ever heard in my life. "There is nothing we can do of our own merit to inherit eternal life," he preached. "Only God can do that. Jesus did that for us on the cross. He died for you and saved you so that you can be with Him forever."

I don't think I have ever been so struck by the Gospel as I was in that moment. I have heard this message numerous times and have been very moved, but the fact that I was hearing it in a non-Lutheran, somewhat conservative "Evangelical" setting struck me in a way it never had before. I was amazed.

And now I know that there is so much more depth to non-denominational, "Evangelical" Christianity than I ever thought possible. There is more than just conservative-leaning agendas and law-heavy, fear-laden sermons about choosing Heaven or Hell. As Christians, we all hold the same core beliefs, that we are saved through the grace of God and through the Holy Spirit's gift of faith in Jesus Christ. We are sisters and brothers in Christ all the same, no matter the denomination or theological emphases.

I do think that there's some middle ground-- a way to incorporate this "Evangelical Christian" outward passion for Jesus and His Gospel in a way that does not automatically offend or become over-the-top, and still have a theology that is very much Lutheran. I am definitely a changed person when it comes to viewing Christianity in general, in all its ecumenical glory. I hope to take this change and apply it to my preaching and leading in the future, so that there can be the best of both worlds-- a Lutheran, grace-filled Gospel with passion and emotion and excitement!!

Why is Learning Biblical Greek So Hard? And Other Mysteries of Life...

Life goes on, and I've been alternately busy/not so busy. Greek is kicking my butt-- it's nice to know that Biblical Ancient languages are consistent that way. I was hoping that Greek would be easier than Hebrew, but no, they're both difficult. In fact, I preferred Hebrew. Oops.

Unlike many other semesters, this semester has at least one big paper or project due every week, rather than having two weeks in which everything is due at once. I'm not sure which way I like better... it's kind of like deciding between fire or ice for your demise. (OK, so it really isn't like that, but I was getting stumped for a cool metaphor.)

The huge amount of reading and schoolwork has been keeping me busy, as it usually does, except I find myself at a loss for what to do on weekends to break up the constant flow of schoolwork. I'm going to the Spaghetti Dinner at my field education church on Saturday evening, but besides the random special events that pop up once in a while my weekends just seem like an extension of school. My goal is to balance out work with play a little more this semester.

I've been working on Internship applications for next year, and I've noticed that it's easier to have specific preferences rather than having none at all. I found myself having to make a decision where I prefer to be geographically, even though I really have no reason to be anywhere specific. I put the northeast first, only because virtually everyone I know is in the northeast. I am applying to Horizon sites, though, so I could end up anywhere if I get one of those. (If you want to know what a Horizon site is, let me know).

Mostly, I'm just taking it one day at a time, and thanking God every day for waking me up.