Singing with Soul

I'm an addict.

No, really. I am. I'm addicted to singing.

I sing in the shower, in the car on the way to work, as I walk to class, as I (haha) clean my apartment. I randomly burst into song when someone around me says a sentence that reminds me of a lyric, and I sing in three different singing groups. Now that I'm thinking about it, my life is as close to a musical as it could possibly be. The only thing missing is the perfectly choreographed dance breaks that are supposed to look spontaneous but have actually been rehearsed to the "T."

Oh, wait, I have Praise Dance for that.

The thing is, I love singing. And I've realized lately that my life would be missing something if I didn't sing. It wouldn't have that "oomph." And, I think I like singing partially because I know that I'm somewhat talented in that capacity. Is that prideful?

However, I became extremely self-conscious of my singing ability on Thursday night, when a member of the choir invited me to informally sing a duet with him after rehearsal. An accomplished Jazz pianist and singer, he was in his element as he took the notes on the page and changed things within the key structure to add syncopation and his own style. He took a traditional Christian hymn and made it sound like a Duke Ellington hit. When I sang with him, I realized that I was not equipped for this style. My classical training meant nothing in this arena. I continued singing the notes exactly as they were written on the page, until finally he shouted over the piano "Have fun with it!!!"

"I am having fun!" I wanted to protest. But I realized that, in this style at least, I'm a stick-in-the-mud. I'm a musical party-pooper. I can only follow the notes on the page and sing those well. The minute I'm asked to put my own style into in, I'm screwed. I'm basically a music monkey.

Boy, was that a blow to my pride. I may be a "good" singer, but I have a really long way to go if I want to be versatile. Right now, I can only sing what's given to me. I need to learn how to make the music my own. I'm guessing that this may not be a learned skill, but I can at least try.

I need to be able to "sing with soul!"